We painted our hideous kitchen so that it's less hideous.

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck) 04/28/2018 at 12:13 • Filed to: Houses

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Here’s a photo from the listing from three (four?) years ago:

That wasn’t white paint, by the way. It was RUSTOLEUM RATTLE-CAN TEXTURED STONE. Worst look and paint ever. They even used it on the trim in several places.

Here’s today:

Goodbye green walls and mismatched oil rubbed bronze knobs and handles. Hello inoffensive white and brushed nickel. Plus, a towel ring! Oooh ahhh.

Behold my tiny outdated kitchen. Hasn’t been remodeled since 1985, all appliances some variation of “old.” Ancient hot water tank used to be behind the stove under the countertop.

Yes, I have a pink countertop. New top is on order, should be here in a few weeks. It will not be pink.

As a reminder, this house is 886 square feet, and I drove 30-something year old Toyotas since I was 23 to get by. Did you think my house was going to look impressive? Fools! 

RallyDarkstrike - Fan of 2-cyl FIATs, Eastern Bloc & Kei cars > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:17

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THE MICROWAVE IS GONE....HOW CAN YOU SURVIVE!

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > RallyDarkstrike - Fan of 2-cyl FIATs, Eastern Bloc & Kei cars 04/28/2018 at 12:18

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I haven’t owned a microwave in 5 years

XJDano > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:19

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I see the cup on the edge of the table and instantly reminded you don’t have kids.

Looks nice.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > XJDano 04/28/2018 at 12:19

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Did you also recognize that the mug has a photo of my dog on it? :D

Nibby > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:21

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how else do you warm up leftover human remains

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Nibby 04/28/2018 at 12:22

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Oven

AestheticsInMotion > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:26

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Eh. There’s a charm to it. My kitchen cabinets are faded aqua blue. It’s quite hideous

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > AestheticsInMotion 04/28/2018 at 12:27

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Did you “Eh” my DIY stuff? A little harsh...

WilliamsSW > Nibby 04/28/2018 at 12:28

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Best served cold, just like leftover Fried chicken

XJDano > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:28

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I did not at first because iPhone 5.

But I’m with you on the hideous countertop decisions. Who thinks a mulch pile would be great in their kitchen?

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:32

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So does this mean you gave up on that house hunting adventure?

E90M3 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:34

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Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:36

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Your kitchen looks a lot like mine. We repainted our cabinets this winter too. White boxes and grey doors

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 04/28/2018 at 12:40

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No, it just means if we chose to sell it would be less offensive. Also we couldn’t agree on any colors, so my wife just came home with a bunch of white one day, and I’m like, “me no care.”

Wacko > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:43

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For a chandelier inspector the lack of chandeliers is alarming

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Wacko 04/28/2018 at 12:44

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I don’t even have a dining area from which to hang a ‘lier

AestheticsInMotion > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:49

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Nah, paint goes a long way. Just, uh... Whatever you do. Don’t let anyone talk you into “aqua”. It will not look like a Caribbean resort.

fintail > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:57

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With all the money you saved over a gut remodel that will be dated in 10 years, you can buy more cars.

Wacko > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 12:58

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Thinking that if you tile the floor and change the counter you can get an extra 10-15 grand when you sell.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Wacko 04/28/2018 at 13:08

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Floor is kind of a can of worms... They literally notched around the old water heater instead of just draining it and removing it. Several times. So there’s about an 1" deep hole the shape of a 40 gallon hot water tank in the back. I also suspect the bottom layer has asbestos. I could just float the difference with some filler and glue but it also shares the floor with the mudroom which has the new hot water tank and dryer. So it’d be a whole bigly project that I’d rather put off.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > fintail 04/28/2018 at 13:10

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But I still have the one car garage issue. And four vehicles. I’m capped :(

But there’s plenty of money I can blow on the IS 

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Spaceball-Two 04/28/2018 at 13:11

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I was thinking about seafoam doors but I was worried that it’d be a little too personal.

diplodicus forgot his password > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 13:14

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You need more bananas.

Patrick Nichols > XJDano 04/28/2018 at 13:22

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I’ve got a bottle of that in my fridge, is it any good?

Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 13:22

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I found the darker colors really shrink an already small room

Patrick Nichols > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 13:25

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Rico > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 13:33

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This is definitely the new trend. Most people I know do not own microwaves but instead use their oven/toaster oven.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Rico 04/28/2018 at 13:40

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I love toaster oven, but I have zero counter space.

punkgoose17 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 13:54

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That is a big improvement. My kitchen needs similar help. It looks like the cheapest early 2000s remodel possible.

fintail > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 14:19

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Any way to expand the garage or make it a tandem? Or at least put up a carport?

The IS might be more fun than kitchen renos.

cmill189 - sans Volvo > Patrick Nichols 04/28/2018 at 14:34

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How did you come across a Bourbon County by accident? They’re released in limited quantities and typically sell out everywhere.

XJDano > Patrick Nichols 04/28/2018 at 15:33

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Hell yeah!

I loved it. It was expensive but worth it.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/28/2018 at 15:34

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That’s a very awkward stove placement.

XJDano > cmill189 - sans Volvo 04/28/2018 at 15:37

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I came across this by accident. Was only one in fridge at liquor store next to other the single expense beers and wines.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/28/2018 at 15:48

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Sure is

cmill189 - sans Volvo > XJDano 04/28/2018 at 20:21

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That’s crazy. If you like dark beers, it’s one of the best.

XJDano > cmill189 - sans Volvo 04/28/2018 at 22:41

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I have come to really enjoy dark beers over the last few years. I’d say this has been one of the best beers I’ve had. At $13.99 I was skeptical that it was over priced, but it was delicious.

With a house full of inlaws (Easter Sunday) this helped tone them all out. My Father in law tried a sip and about gagged.

Patrick Nichols > cmill189 - sans Volvo 04/29/2018 at 08:53

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Good friend ran a craft beer store and would pick up random stuff all the time. Never got around to trying this one, looks like I’ll try it tonight

Patrick Nichols > XJDano 04/29/2018 at 08:54

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I think I was gifted mine or just didn’t realize how expensive it was in a larger order. Couldn’t have been Sam Adams utopia expensive though, I would’ve noticed that.

cmill189 - sans Volvo > Patrick Nichols 04/29/2018 at 09:52

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Soo good!